You’ve probably guessed that I am overweight. It’s okay if you did. I’ve been a bigger person my entire life. It’s all I know how to be. But even I know when I have reached a point where it has gone too far. I’ve been cutting back how much soda I drink (I’m sorry Mt. Dew, nectar of the soda gods) and I have been drinking a lot more water. I’m proud of myself for it. My skin feels and looks better. I feel better knowing I’m doing something good for myself.
So when Cinnabon opened at our local mall, I decided I should have a cinnamon roll. I haven’t been to a Cinnabon since I lived in Colorado over 10 years ago and it sounded like a nice treat. I didn’t need it, but I wanted it. My boss had had one and it smelled so good. And so, I walked through the mall, past the annoying kiosks that always try to jump me to spray or rub things on me (come on guys… I freaking work here, okay?) and walked into the yummy smelling shop.
I ordered a “Classic Cinnabon” which is essentially their normal cinnamon roll with nothing fancy about it. It’s admittedly a little on the large side and if you aren’t into sweets, it can be pretty overwhelming. Unfortunately, I happen to love most sweets that aren’t overly rich and cinnamon rolls sort of fall into that category. Sure, they had a “mini” option but I figured whatever I didn’t finish I could have later.
Awesome… they have milk too! Even the cookie place that’s been in our mall for years and years doesn’t have milk and I always thought that was weird – one of many reasons I very rarely buy cookies. And thus, I considered this even more of a treat and “meant to be” because I could have milk with it too!
A young lady rings me up. She’s probably 18… very early 20’s at most. She’s small – short and thin. I’m only telling you this in order to paint the full picture. Because let’s face it, if what happened during my transaction were between me and another overweight woman, I probably would have just laughed it off. Just… me being honest here.
I pay for my items, she hands back my debit card and proceeds to get out a box for my cinnamon roll. She pauses, turns to me and says “Oh, did you want the mini cinnamon roll, or the classic?” Well, I paid for the classic size, so that seemed like a silly question. I asked for the classic, she boxed it, turned to me and spoke again…
“Yeah… I could never eat all of that.”
In one, short sentence I felt body shamed. I felt fat. I felt gross. I knew I would probably eat the whole thing.
I did eat the whole thing. Basically, fuck you Cinnabon girl.
Again, I admit it maybe wouldn’t have been a big deal if a bigger woman said it to me. It’s kind of how black people can say “the n word” and white people can’t.
I totally just offended people. Sorry.